Funny Back to School Stories Back to the OHP

Funny Back to School Stories

Back to the OHP

Dear All,

When I returned from my holiday, I notice from our schedule for the September weekend that during the 'Worship' day we will be looking at 'Worship and vision, multimedia in worship.'  I thought the following definition taken from the writings of St.Adrian de Plass might inform the session and stand as a warning to us all!

Overhead Projector: often referred to as an OHP. Confusion with the term OAP is a bad idea, as discovered by a man in one of our local churches who announced the following:

'I have been going through the OAPs in our church and it has become clear to me that many of them are simply no use to us any more. They are elderly, shabby, difficult to understand, poorly put together, old fashioned and often theologically unsound. Some of them are literally falling apart. I have weeded out a number of these redundant OAPs and I suggest we store them in the church cupboard until the autumn. Have a look though if you wish, and feel free to take home any that you fancy, otherwise I will dispose of them on the church bonfire'.

Every blessing

Hugh-John

The Golden Rule of Teaching - Know your Pupils

A head teacher is making his rounds of the school when he hears a terrible commotion coming from one of the classrooms. He rushes in and spots one boy, taller than the others, who seems to be making the most noise.

He seizes the lad, drags him to the hall, and tells him to wait there until he is excused. Returning to the classroom, the head teacher restores order and lectures the class for half an hour about the importance of good behaviour.

'Now,' he says, 'are there any questions?'

One girl stands up timidly. 'Please sir,' she asks, 'may we have our teacher back?'